Dear __________,

Dear Salesman across the street,
                                                  I realize that you are around the age of 65 and that you don't want anyone to know that you don't have any hair. However, a comb-over is no way to put off the inevitable. Especially when the wind is blowing in the opposite direction of your comb-over, causing it to stand straight up in the air like a roosters feathered head thingy. I don't really think your comb-over is fooling anyone. Just. Cut. It.
*ahem*
                    -Thank you
                                      The Underpaid Receptionist
                                    c/o The Overprivileged Office